Domestic / Intimate Partner Violence – Know the Signs!
Would you know if your good friend from the office or your aunt that lives in Dallas is involved in a domestic / intimate partner violence relationship? Probably not. Many times the abuse starts slowly, is concealed, and accelerates over time.
Domestic violence takes many forms, which include emotional, physical, and sexual abuse. It occurs in heterosexual or same-sex relationships. Husband, wife, children, partners. The most important goal of domestic violence and abuse is to gain and maintain total and unyielding control over the victim.
How do you know if you may be in a domestic / intimate partner violence relationship with your partner?
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Does your partner have a bad or unpredictable temper? Call you horrible names, insult you or put you down?
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Does your partner limit your access to money, the phone, or the car? Are you constantly checked on about your whereabouts?
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Are you discouraged from seeing family members and friends? Does your partner act excessively jealous and possessive without cause or reason?
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Does your partner see you as property or a sex object and force you to have sex at times or in ways against your will?
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Does your partner threaten to take your children away and harm them or to commit suicide if you leave him/her?
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Does your partner blame you for his/her abusive behavior or destroy your belongings?
If you are already in an abusive situation, are your currently living in a hostile environment and:
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Is your abusive partner threating violence
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Has your abuser attacked you with aggressive, belittling, profane, or violent behavior so you know “Who the Boss is”?
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After the abuse, does your partner feel concocted or temporary remorse, guilt and does he/she repeatedly promise to change?
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Your abuser comes up with excuses and blames “you” as the abuser. Does your relationship periodically go back into a” Normal Phase”?
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Is all well until your abuser sets up his/her next situation when he/she can justify abusing you again?
If you are in a relationship with a Domestic / Intimate Partner who is exposing this behavior or you are already having abusive situations, seek help now! Abusive relationships will destroy your self-worth and lead to anxiety and depression. Break free from this relationship by recognizing that such conduct is dangerous, that you are valuable and that you do not have to suffer this emotional pain!
If you are currently in a relationship or marriage with an abusive partner and need legal help, contact a knowledgeable attorney, other shelter or enforcement agency to obtain help.
Texas Divorce – How Long Will It Take to Get Divorced and Other Important Facts
To file for a divorce in Texas, you must be a Texas Resident for 6 months, and you must have lived within the county you plan to file in for at least 90 days immediately prior to filing of your divorce petition. Time spent by a Texas resident outside of Texas, while in the military, satisfies the residency requirement in Texas for a divorce.
Texas does not recognize legal separations.
It is possible to get a divorce even though the other party does not want the divorce to take place. Texas is a “no fault divorce state.” “No fault” means that one spouse does not have to prove the other spouse has done anything wrong in order to obtain a divorce. You cannot be held to a marriage because your spouse does not want to sign or refuses to participate in the divorce process. The court will enter divorce orders even if the other party refuses to sign them.
Texas requires a minimum 60 day waiting period before any divorce can be finalized. The 60 day period begins to run from the time the Original Petition for Divorce is actually filed with the court. In other words, the shortest time it will take to finalize a divorced in Texas is 61 days. On occasion, in domestic violence cases, there is an exception to the 60 day rule. If the parties are in agreement, a divorce proceeding can be finalized immediately following the sixty-day waiting period. On average, however, the time period is more likely to run 90 to 120 days in an uncontested divorce due to the crowding of court dockets and the time necessary for counsel to draft necessary legal documents and obtain the agreement of both parties regarding the wording of the final documents. If the parties are not in agreement, the time necessary to finalize the divorce will depend on the conduct of both parties and their attorneys, the court’s schedule, the matters in controversy and the complexity of the contested issues. From start to finish, the divorce process may go through a number of phases which might include temporary orders, exchange of financial information, psychological evaluations (in child custody cases), alternative dispute resolution, trial, and appeal. A divorce in which the parties are deeply in opposition to an agreement on some or all of the core issues may take anywhere from several months to several years to complete.
As to the division of marital assets, Texas is a community property state. For more information on community and separate property, see our blog, Divorce: What is separate property and what is community property.
It is important to remember that, although the statutory waiting period to finalize a divorced is 60 days, it is more likely than not that your divorce will “not” be finalized on the 61st day following the filing of your petition for divorce.
Stay at Home Dads – More fathers Are Opting To Stay Home With Their Children
The number of stay-at-home dads is increasing again in the United States! Pew Research Center has just published a new report, “Growing Number of Dads at home with the kids”, and it is impressive! The world is changing and Dads are definitely more hands on quality time with their children.
The major commanding improvements are the number of fathers who stay home with their children under 18. This figure has just about doubled since 1989, and now 16% or 2 million fathers are full time stay-at-home caregivers to their children. This percentage has grown from 10% in 1989.
What are some of the reasons for the strong growth of stay-at-home dads?
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35% are home because of illness or disability
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23% cannot find a job
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21% stay to care for family and home
Even with this increase in stay-at-home dads, 16% of fathers with children still live apart from their kids.
52% of stay-at-home fathers are white, 20% are Hispanic and 16% are black. In addition, and almost equal share of working fathers (48%) and mothers (52%) say they would prefer to be home raising their children, but must work for family income.
Preparing for a Texas Divorce
Preparing for a Texas Divorce – Part 1: Assets
Preparing for a divorce is painful no matter the circumstance. Before you get into the tangle of the divorce process, you can reduce the expense, stress and conflict many people face by making sure you are prepared. Planning ahead allows you to make sound decisions and start preparing for your life post-divorce, and may also help you avoid post-divorce pitfalls. Below is a list of items you may want to gather before counseling with an attorney.
Documents
- A Listing of all Real Property, address and location, including (include time-shares and vacation properties):
- Deeds of Trust
- Notes
- Legal Description
- Mortgage Companies (Name, Address, Telephone Number, Account Number, Balance of Note, Monthly Payments)
- Current fair market value
- Mineral Interests (include any property in which you own the mineral estate, separate and apart from the surface estate, such as oil and gas leases; also include royalty interests, work interests, and producing and non-producing oil and gas wells.
- Name of mineral interest
- Type of interest
- County of location
- Legal description
- Name of producer/operator
- Current market value
- Cash and accounts with financial institutions (checking, savings, commercial bank accounts, credit union funds, IRA’s, CD’s, 401K’s, pension plans and any other form of retirement accounts):
- Name of institution, address and telephone number
- Amount in institution on date of marriage
- Amount in institution currently
- Account Number
- Names on Account
- Publicly traded stock, bonds and other securities (include securities not in a brokerage, mutual fund, or retirement account):
- Number of shares
- Type of securities
- Certificate numbers
- In possession of
- Name of exchange which listed
- Pledged as collateral?
- Date acquired
- Tax basis
- Current market value
- If stock (date option granted, number of shares and value per share)
- Closely held business interests:
- Name of business
- Address
- Type of business
- % of ownership
- Number of shares owned if applicable
- Value of shares
- Balance of accounts receivables
- Cash flow reports
- Balance of liabilities
- List of company assets
- Retirement Benefits
- Exact name of plan
- Address of plan administrator
- Employer
- Employee
- Starting date of contributions
- Amount in account on date of marriage
- Amount currently in account
- Balance of any loan against plan
- Insurance and Annuities
- Name of insurance company
- Policy Number
- Insured
- Type of insurance (whole/term/universal)
- Amount of monthly premiums
- Date of Issue
- Face amount
- Cash surrender value
- Current surrender value
- Designated beneficiary
- Motor Vehicles (including mobile homes, boats, trailers, motorcycles, recreational vehicles; exclude company owned)
- Year
- Make
- Model
- Value
- Name on title
- VIN Number
- Fair Market Value
- Name of creditor (if any), address and telephone
- Persons listed on debt
- Account number
- Balance of any loan and monthly payment
- Net Equity in vehicle
- Money owed by spouse (including any expected federal or state income tax refund but not including receivables connected with any business)
10. Household furniture, furnishings and Fixtures
11. Electronics and computers
12. Antiques, artwork and collectibles (including works of art, paintings, tapestry, rugs, crystal, coin or stamp collections)
13. Miscellaneous sporting goods and firearms
14. Jewelry
15. Animals and livestock
16. Farming equipment
17. Club Memberships
18. Travel Award Benefits (including frequent flyer miles)
19. Safe deposit box items
20. Burial plots
21. Items in any storage facility
22. A listing of separate property (property prior to marriage, family heir looms, property gifted)
- 23. Listing of all liabilities (including mortgages, credit card debt, personal loans, automobile loans, etc.):
1. Name of entity, address and telephone number
2. Account number
3. Amount owed
4. Monthly payment
5. Property securing payment (if any)
6. Persons listed as liable for debt