Would you know if your good friend from the office or your aunt that lives in Dallas is involved in a domestic / intimate partner violence relationship?  Probably not. Many times the abuse starts slowly, is concealed, and accelerates over time.

Domestic violence takes many forms, which include emotional, physical, and sexual abuse.  It occurs in heterosexual or same-sex relationships. Husband, wife, children, partners. The most important goal of domestic violence and abuse is to gain and maintain total and unyielding control over the victim.

How do you know if you may be in a domestic / intimate partner violence relationship with your partner?

• Does your partner have a bad or unpredictable temper? Call you horrible names, insult you or put you down?

• Does your partner limit your access to money, the phone, or the car? Are you constantly checked on about your whereabouts?

• Are you discouraged from seeing family members and friends? Does your partner act excessively jealous and possessive without cause or reason?

• Does your partner see you as property or a sex object and force you to have sex at times or in ways against your will?

• Does your partner threaten to take your children away and harm them or to commit suicide if you leave him/her?

• Does your partner blame you for his/her abusive behavior or destroy your belongings?

If you are already in an abusive situation, are your currently living in a hostile environment and:

• Is your abusive partner threating violence

• Has your abuser attacked you with aggressive, belittling, profane, or violent behavior so you know “Who the Boss is”?

• After the abuse, does your partner feel concocted or temporary remorse, guilt and does he/she repeatedly promise to change?

• Your abuser comes up with excuses and blames “you” as the abuser.  Does your relationship periodically go back into a” Normal Phase”?

• Is all well until your abuser sets up his/her next situation when he/she can justify abusing you again?

If you are in a relationship with a Domestic / Intimate Partner who is exposing this behavior or you are already having abusive situations, seek help now!  Abusive relationships will destroy your self-worth and lead to anxiety and depression. Break free from this relationship by recognizing that such conduct is dangerous, that you are valuable and that you do not have to suffer this emotional pain!

If you are currently in a relationship or marriage with an abusive partner and need legal help, contact a knowledgeable attorney, other shelter or enforcement agency to obtain help.