Emotional Abuse in a Marriage

Emotional Abuse in a Marriage

Many headlines are common as to in what ways Domestic Physical Violence and Physical Abuse affects families and individuals. Consider however the silent spoiler of marriage: Emotional Abuse!

Most domestic abuse and violence commences with deliberate on-going negative behavior by one partner/parent against another family member as the abuser demeans and dismantles the victim’s feelings of self-worth and independence.

Just because a person does not end up in the hospital as a victim of physical abuse, emotional scars and a resulting negative self-image may adversely impact the individual for their entire life.

Emotional abuse often includes verbal abuse, controlling behavior, intimidation and isolation. Most emotional abusers will also make multiple violence threats and orchestrate other non-physical types of punishments if their victims refuse to blindly obey.

Since “the Abuser’s Goal is Always Control”, economic/ financial control is one of the most common forms of emotional abuse. Victims have feelings of “no way out” from abusive relationships and strict financial control imposed by the abuser results in spiraling hopelessness.

What are some serious financial control issues to look out for? Do you have a problem?

  • Total controlling of all family expenses.

  • Withholding money and credit cards and strict, unrealistic allowance restrictions.

  • Withholding basic necessities (food, clothing, shelter, medical needs).

  • Controlling your choice of career and prevention or obstruction from gainful employment.

  • Sabotaging your job by constantly calling you, causing problems with your boss or associates, and causing you to miss work.

  • Stealing money from you.

All types of abuse are sick, but emotional abuse the silent spoiler of lives is often overlooked until it is too late.  Every family member in these cases may be effected and scared for years.  Many children who are tainted by abuse never completely know a normal loving relationship with a partner, spouse, or child since their low self-esteem prevents normal intimacy with others.

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