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Jun
14

Summer Visitation and Divorce? Your Sharing Attitude Will Be the Happy Force for your Children and Family!

We are approaching the end of the school year and the beginning of the long Summer Visitation!  You have probably received the letter/ email from your EX requesting the setup for the Summer Visitation with the children.

Usually this is not a happy time for the primary care giving parent, but from personal experience, you need a break and letting the children spend some extended time with the other parent will give them a chance to share time and experiences with this parent and make them happy. Remember your children love you and nothing will change that fact!

From practicing family law for a long time now, I believe there are elements in divorce that will never change:

  1. You cannot make someone love you and stay with you if they choose not to.
  2. The only person that you can be completely responsible for in behavior is YOURSELF!
  3. If you choose to have a bad attitude and try to hurt your EX by alienating your children, then not only are you not winning the divorce game, but you are causing serious damage to your Children. Even if you win, you are a loser. The Kids didn’t ask for this Divorce, they are often stuck because Mom and Dad couldn’t be happy together!

After considering these ideas and deciding no, your children were not the case of the divorce, try giving some effort to help make your children happy during Summer Visitation with their other parent and not worry about you.

Here are my “New Divorce No No Rules” that will make the Summer Visitation happier for the entire family including your EX:

  1. No talking bad about the other spouse! This is your battle, not the kids! The kids are still related to their other parent and love that parent.
  2. Make this Summer Visitation an adventure for the kids. Mommy and Daddy are not together anymore, but the children should feel that they are going to spend this special time with their other parent without you acting mad or hurt. Never let the kids know that you are unhappy about the Summer separation and may not love them if they are happy!  Let the kids look forward to a wonderful summer adventure with their dad or mom and don’t look back!
  3. Get with your ex-spouse and determine the Summer visitation schedule.  Share this schedule with the kids so they will know what is going on and what time will be shared with both parents. Meanness will not be tolerated, be nice!   
  4. Talk with the children on their ideas for the Summer Visitation. Maybe share these ideas with your EX. Remember: this is not about your feelings, it is about the love and needs of your family.

“The more you give in to the love of your family, the better you will feel in your heart.”

You, my friend,  will eventually get over this hurt of the Summer separation with the kids and maybe get a little rest yourself. Before you know it, the kids will be back, school will start and your family’s live will go on, but it is always the decisions you make to help your children cope with this family split that will determine your true character as a parent and a person.

Hoping you and your family will have a wonderful Summer and this blog has help to put a smile on your face!   —-Mark A. Nacol

By Nacol Law Firm | Possession of Children
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Jan
10

2020 Texas Divorce: What Happens During the Divorce Process?

Divorce is frustrating, confusing, and personally resentful. Divorce is never a pleasant experience even in the most amicable terms. It is important to know what you are in for when a divorce is filed. An original petition will be filed by one of the spouses (the petitioner). Then, the Respondent spouse must be served with papers by a process server unless they will agree to waiver service.  

After service of the original petition, the Petitioner may file for a Temporary Restraining Order (“TRO”) to protect the child and marital estate. Once a TRO is granted by the District Judge, a temporary order hearing will be set within 14 days. This temporary order hearing is extremely important and will determine the direction of the case.

Temporary Order hearings are usually condensed to 20 minutes a side depending on the complexities of the case. Within these 20 minutes, you will have to put on evidence for your entire case regarding custody of the children, management of the marital estate, and any other considerations such as receivership of a business.

After the temporary orders hearing, the case will dive into full throttle litigation. Discovery on both sides is usually conducted including interrogatories, admissions, and production of documentation. The documents that are usually requested consists of bank statements, retirement pensions, social media pages, text messages, and emails. Each case requires specific Discovery requests that are narrowly tailored to the facts presented. Discovery can last months and usually follow with motions to compel and sanctions. In highly contested cases the rigors of discovery and compiling documentation can be brutal.

During the Discovery phase, Depositions may be warranted. Depositions consists of your attorney questioning your spouse and any other witnesses that are relevant to the case for impeachment purposes. Depositions are necessary if the case will go to a jury, because impeachment of your spouse is a necessity to prove your truthfulness.

Mediation is often mandatory in Courts, but this is the general rule. Certain Courts in the Dallas, Fort Worth, and Collin county do not require mandatory mediation. Each Court has its own rules of procedure and requirements. If the Mediation fails to produce a settlement between you and your spouse, then the only thing left is a trial.

Depending on the complexities of the case and assets, a trial can last half a day or be a three-day trial. Most trials are before the District Judge. Certain facts may give rise to a jury trial, but a jury trial is more costly and can take up more time. After the trial is complete the parties will have to wait for a ruling. This can take days to months depending on the case and jurisdiction.

When the final ruling is given to all parties, the Judge will charge one party to create a final order that will be submitted to the Court. This can give rise to more litigation depending on the interpretation of the Judge’s rulings by both parties. Finally, when both parties agree to a final order or the Judge determines which version of the final order is proper, then the case will be over.

Divorce can be a painful process that lasts 6 months to three years depending on the circumstances and the nature of the parties involved. If you are about to file for a Divorce in the DFW Metroplex or need help call the Nacol Law Firm, experienced family law attorneys to represent your best interests throughout this painful process.

Nacol Law Firm P.C.
Julian Nacol, Attorney

By Nacol Law Firm | Prepare for Your Divorce
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