13
Aug
2010

Father’s Rights – Visitation Enforcement

What is needed for visitation enforcement?

  1. A valid court order that has been signed by a judge or issued by the district clerk’s office, certified as having been signed by a judge.
  2. Be sure to read your order thoroughly.  If you do not understand any of the provisions, take it to an attorney and have them explain it to you.
  3. The custodial parent must have been validly served with the court order or it must be shown that the they had prior knowledge of the court order and its content.
  4. The custodial parent must have full knowledge of the above two factors and must be intentionally and willfully violating the court order.

Despite the fact that you may have a valid court order, many police departments do not want to get involved in enforcing civil orders.  If you call the police department and show them the order they may or may not assist you in gaining access to your children.  Despite whether you get your children or not, you need to ask them to create a police report stating that you were there to pick up your children and noting the time and date you were present.  If the police refuse to prepare a report, go to a local grocery store or fast food restaurant and purchase something so that you have a receipt stating that you were in the area and stating the date and time you were there.

How to prove a denial of visitation.

Take a witness along with you – preferably an off-duty constable or deputy or neutral party.   Have your witness stay in the vehicle, but with the window down so that he/she can hear any conversations that take place.  Have your vehicle parked in such a way that the witness can see you at all times.

Take a copy of your divorce decree along with you which shows you are suppose to have possession of your children on the date and time you arrive to pick them up. 

Always be on time, and if possible a few minutes early.

If the custodial parent does not answer the door or have the child available to exercise visitation then call the police and request a Police Incident Report.  If the police will not issue a police report then make sure you document the incident as best as possible.  After two or three violations, take the reports, along with any witness statements, to an attorney to discuss how to bring an enforcement action against the custodial parent who is violating the order.

Take a tape recorder with you, have it running from the time you approach the residence, and do not stop it until you leave.  Keep the tape recorder running as you leave the area.

As you approach the residence state the following facts in the recorder:  your complete name, the address you are approaching, the reason you are there “I am going to pick up my children as stated in the final decree,” state who is with you and why, state the time of day, state when you are leaving and a brief description of what occurred.  Keep a written record of each recording and label them according to date.

Keep a calendar of each denied visitation.

Make sure you have a credible witness each time you try to exercise your possession with your children.

Do not argue with your exhibit-spouse regardless of how angry you are or whether you get your children or not.  Staying calm will work in your favor in the long run.

If you file an enforcement action, if the custodial parent continues to deny you visitation after the suit is brought, continue to go and knock on the door to exercise your visitation, as each separate violation of the court order can be used in the enforcement action.

24
May
2010

Parental Alienation And False & Malicious Domestic Violence Allegations

Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) is a generally recognized platform that may result in child abuse. This occurs when a custodial parent of a child from a separated family uses deception to deliberately alienate children from their non custodial parent.

Misplaced Domestic Violence Restraining and Protective Orders are an excellent tool to advance the Alienating Parent’s malice! Misguided Protective Orders of a Court based on such false representations may remove the Accused Abuser Parent from the home, bar the Accused Abuser from seeing his/her children and give the Alienating Parent total physical custody of the children. The Accused Abuser Parent is now effectively “Guilty Until Proven Innocent”.

Once the Alienator obtains a Restraining Order through false domestic violence allegations, the Accused Abuser Parent may find it difficult to defend himself or herself against the false allegations.  This sends the implied message to the children that “Daddy/Mommy” is bad or dangerous, stamped by the court.

The Accused Abuser Parent may only see his/her children in a cold and uninviting supervised visitation setting. Supervised Visitation Centers are facilities where a child is taken to meet with the Accused Abuser Parent in a third party monitored location.  A third party observes the Accused Abuser Parent during their visit with their children so that the child is “protected” at all times.

Often the supervised visit is demeaning for the visiting parent in the eyes of his/her child.  The impression to the child that “Daddy or Mommy” is dangerous comes across loud and clear since most children only see lock up situations on TV and these people are seriously viewed as being bad.

Many Alienating Parents use this scary situation to encourage their child not to see the Accused Abuser Parent at all. The more time a child is out of contact with the Alienated Parent the deeper the scaring and recovery period for that child.

Dr. Richard A. Gardner coined the term “Parental Alienation Syndrome” (PAS) in 1985. Dr. Gardner found that a child subjected to continual negativity and manipulation by the Custodial Parent over an extended period of time against the other parent would eventually adapt the distorted view presented. At the end of the day, what the Alienating Parent fails to understand is that his/her selfishness makes his/her child the “victim” who pays a hefty price in lost self esteem.

Unfortunately, False Domestic Violence Allegations have become more common in Divorce / Child Custody Proceedings. Most Judges usually enter a restraining or protective order for the safety of the child and in too many cases an Accused Abuser Parent is guilty until proven innocent!